Tag Archives: news

Dispatches from Europe’s Hidden War With Jordan B. Peterson

Editor’s note: Jordan B. Peterson is the only Western correspondent in Ukraine, visiting the front lines and covering the ongoing secret war in Europe that the Western liberal cuck media doesn’t want you to know about! He’s been shot at by Russian-backed separatists and thrown into dumpsters on several occasions by Ukrainian military personnel, volunteers, relief workers, OSCE SMM observers, clergy, Plast scouts, and on one occasion, a live bear, although Jordan maintains that he got in a few good smacks in the process. Without further ado, The Heritage Foundation Presents: Daily Outrage Magazine brings you Peterson’s latest dispatch!

When I first arrived in Bakhmut I was concerned at the lack of steak restaurants. As many of my readers know, I have been on an all-beef diet for some time in an attempt to push my testosterone levels ever higher and suppress the chaotic estrogen which stealthily lurks within the body of all males, always waiting for the opportune moment to strike and take over their testicles one and for all. Ukraine has a noted lack of steakhouses. Many restaurants sell “kutlety,” which do contain a good deal of beef but are also commonly tainted with pork and other non-beef ingredients, which while indistinguishable to the palate, still leaves a virile male dangerously vulnerable to a surprise estrogen-led testicular coup d’etat. And because I cannot slap dishonest and wily estrogen in the face as I would surely do to anything else that might threaten my overwhelming masculinity, the beef-only diet is my only option. Luckily I managed to find a butcher shop that would sell me large cuts of meat ahead of time. I would be forced to cook my own meals over the next few days, but this was far preferable to failing to follow my strict gastronomic regimen and succumbing to the chaos.

My first impressions of Bakhmut, like my first impression of the Donbas as a whole, is that it is a very messy place. Certainly Donbas residents could solve 90% of their problems if they just cleaned their towns. People are constantly screaming about pensions, Russian invaders, and corrupt local gangsters, but they are unwilling to take the most elementary steps towards self-improvement and self-realization. As I always say, you must get your own house in order, bucko, and certainly the people in the Donbas should start with this right away. Things like corruption or a Russian invasion are just methods by which they shirk responsibility for the chaos in their own lives, and it shows by the mess everywhere. I tried pointing this out some residents waiting at a bus stop, and this incidentally it was the first time I was unceremoniously thrown into a dumpster by these ungrateful degenerates. They were indeed fortunate that I had not yet consumed my daily allotment of 2kg of beef at that point in the day, because if I had I can assure you it would have been a bloodbath. A bloodbath consisting of their blood, not mine. This is the way of natural law. This is the lion of order locked in eternal struggle against the dragon of chaos.

In truth this whole mess could be traced to the so-called “Maidan” revolution which culminated in February of 2014. Right away I could tell things would go wrong seeing as how Maidan was essentially a protest movement, and protesting is an arrogant and pointless endeavor. Arrogant because by protesting you are telling the world that you know how to do things better than those above you in the natural hierarchy. Pointless because individuals trying to change the world are entertaining a delusion since they cannot possibly change the world but they can only change themselves as individuals. It’s ludicrous to talk about standing up to so-called “tyrants” when one isn’t willing to just stand up straight, with one’s shoulders back, projecting dominance much like the mighty lobster.

lobster

A paragon of virtue who embodies the kind of dominant personality the Maidan protesters should have adopted for themselves instead of making a mess of things. 

By unleashing the dragons of chaos in their own capital, the Ukrainians have left their country vulnerable not only to Russian invasion, but something even worse- Derrida inspired post-modernist neo-Marxism. Sure, Ukraine’s Institution of National Memory claims to have carried out so-called “decommunization,” which superficially seems like it would immunize the country against such totalitarian philosophies, but it isn’t hard to imagine that decommunization could become recommunization. With their striving to join chaos-infested Europe, it is only a matter of time before people in this country are, like in Canada, compelled to use different pronouns and gender-neutral language, which may seem insignificant at first, but will inevitably lead to another Holodomor. Five Holodomors, all at the same time, in fact.

Some may say my concern over pronouns and traditional gender concepts is nothing but alarmism. But what if I were to tell you, dear readers, that the Ukrainian language, much like the Russian language, has not two, but three genders? Worse still, adjectives and past tense verbs are literally forced to agree with the self-identified gender of the noun they are connected to, even if that gender is neither male nor female but, as they called it, “neuter.” Clearly this legacy of Stalin and the Bolsheviks is so deeply rooted in this country that its chaotic ideology is interwoven with the language itself.

Getting back to my trip to Bakhmut, I had an opportunity to see many members of the Ukrainian armed forces. They truly embody a great many of the classic Jungian heroic archetypes, from the young hero on a journey of self-realization to the wise mentor and the mildly irritated vampire wizard. My only concern was that they have foolishly invited chaos dragons into their own army, by which I mean they have females serving as soldiers as opposed to state-regulated concubines to reward males. I wanted to warn them of the dangers of doing male professions and looking attractive in the workplace, but unfortunately I speak neither Ukrainian nor Russian, and I do not plan to learn as I categorically refuse to learn a language that would compel me to recognize three genders. From there it is only a short leap to the Gulag Archipelago. In any case I can only hope that the right-minded men of the Ukrainian armed forces will rein in these rebellious women before it’s too late, especially those three who threw me in a dumpster while I was trying to warn them about the sexual connotations of wearing lipstick via pantomime.

One warning I would give to would-be visitors is that public bathroom facilities are often poorly maintained, so plan accordingly. Naturally this didn’t pose a problem to me thanks to my all-beef diet, which allows me to go weeks on end without having to defecate. Also if you plan to give any lectures on the dangers posed to Western civilization by neo-Marxist feminism, you may be disappointed to find the young people inattentive and generally insolent. This one nine-year-old girl was acting insanely defiant while I was yelling at her about the virtues of arranged marriage and government enforce monogamy, and I was right about to slap her silly when a crowd of her classmates treacherously ambushed me from behind and threw me in a dumpster. Rest assured this is not over. Mess with the alpha lobster and you will get the claw.

As I rode the bus back to the train station in the nearby town of Kostianynivka, I was at least relieved to get out of the city after sundown, as it is apparent that this part of the country is almost certain to be infested with witches. And as I was riding on that train back to Kyiv, I couldn’t help but think while devouring my last chunk of raw beef that perhaps I was riding on a chaos dragon now, swaying back and forth as it sped through the steppe like estrogen coursing through the veins of this modern society’s soy-fed young males.

In the end I realized there was little hope for this land. The chaos has claimed it. It is a messy teenager’s room which no one wants to clean. So to President Petro Poroshenko, who so often demands help from the West against Russian aggression, I can only offer these words of sage-like advice: Sort yourself out, bucko.

Also do not think I have forgiven you for throwing me in that dumpster. You have made a powerful enemy, Chocolate man!

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Ukrainian Armed Forces Receive Deep Concerns From US, EU Members

YAVORIV- The Ukrainian Armed Forces have just received the first shipment of “deep concerns” as part of a multinational military aid package in response to last Sunday’s incident in the Kerch Strait, where Russian coast guard ships attacked and captured three Ukrainian naval vessels along with their crews. Almost immediately after the incident was reported, representatives from the US and several of its NATO allies immediately announced their intentions to send aid to Ukraine in the form of both “concerns” and later “deep concerns” in order to counter Russia’s actions.

One State Department official told reporters on Monday that the Trump administration had also considered sending “grave concerns,” but this was later canceled so as “to avoid provoking escalation from the Russian side.” Meanwhile, experts disagree on whether the White House’s response was adequate or too provocative given the danger of opening another front in the conflict between the government in Kiev and rebel separatists in the east who are extremely well supplied, wear uniforms and equipment almost identical to that of the Russian armed forces, have more tanks and armored vehicles than some NATO countries, and whose leadership has historically contained a conspicuously high number of Russian citizens since their movement suddenly appeared in the spring of 2014.

“Deep concerns are not nearly enough if you want to send the right message to Putin,” said Anders Auslander, a fellow at a DC-based think tank.

“The only way you are going to raise the costs and deter him from further aggression is to equip Ukraine’s military with extremely grave concerns. There’s simply no other way.”

Other experts, however, suggest that even mild concern could provoke all-out war, possibly drawing the US and its allies into the conflict.

“We have to see things from Moscow’s point of view,” says Steve Kuhn, a professor of Soviet-Russian history.

“For years they’ve been watching as the US and NATO constantly express concern about Russia. If you want to start World War III, I can’t think of a better way than to arm the Ukrainian nationalists with more concerns, especially deep concerns.”

Meanwhile, Ukrainian military personnel are struggling to distribute the concerns and train personnel on how to use them while they are on full alert for a possible Russian ground invasion.

“I don’t understand how we’re supposed to use these,” says Roman Bondarenko, 27, a lieutenant in one of Ukraine’s mechanized infantry brigades.

“All these shipping containers with NATO markings arrived at the rail depot, but when we opened them they were empty. Nothing but air.”

Serhii Hopko, 19, is a soldier in Bondarenko’s platoon who also expressed his disappointment with the latest shipment of NATO military aid.

“We hear reports that the Russians are moving tens of thousands of troops and hundreds of tanks to the border, and we’re supposed to fight with this,” he said, gesturing to the empty shipping container behind him.

conext

KIEV- US Air Force crews unload the first shipment of deep concerns to aid Ukraine’s military in the face of renewed threats from Russia over access to the sea of Azov

Meanwhile, Russian officials slammed the decision to aid Ukraine’s military with deep concerns as “irresponsible” and a “clear provocation.”

“This simply shows that our Western partners are not interested in creating lasting peace in the Donbass, but rather irresponsibly encouraging the Poroshenko regime to escalate the war further,” Russian Foreign Ministry Spokeswoman Maria Zakharova wrote on her official Facebook page.

Zakarhova also warned that Russia would be forced to take “appropriate, and proportional measures” in response to the new aid package. While it is not entirely clear what those measures might entail, military analysts and open source investigators have been monitoring Russian military activity in the region and believe they have already seen signs of a response.

“Based on intelligence provided via satellite imaging, social media, and other open source information, it would appear that Russia is already responding to NATO’s concerns and deep concerns with additional main battle tanks and attack helicopters,” said one Pentagon analyst.

BS highlights

Last week has produced too much BS for me to handle with my current projects, so I’m giving you another highlights reel. Yeah, I know, it’s the clip show of blog posts, but it is practical and I have to devote most of my time to pursuits which earn money.

NATOphobia

As we all know, the go-to excuse for why Russia needs a corrupt dictatorship is always: “NATO encirclement!”  For some reason, countries like Finland and Sweden don’t seem to be too concerned about NATO encirclement, in spite of their small military forces and lack of nuclear weapons. But of course if you listen to vatniks tell it- that’s because Finland and Sweden are just whorish slaves of the US, unlike independent Russia, whose living standards are laughably poor compared to those states and most other “American colonies” in Europe.

But how real was the threat of NATO encirclement, particularly considering the fact that at no time has the alliance considered invading Russia, nor did it ever raise territorial claims against the country? Turns out that as usual, Putin and his crew were bullshitting. See for yourself.

The truth is that the increase in NATO activity was deliberately provoked by Putin, and he was probably counting on it. He needs it because he could see storm clouds on the horizon possibly before Maidan. And yet in spite of all Putin’s pathetic sabre-rattling which only leads to more plane crashes, the US is still downsizing its military and closing bases in Europe. The US army alone still plans to cut 40,000 personnel in the next two years. This doesn’t bode well for Operation: Barbarossa II.

Russia’s elite loves the West

One of the most infuriating thing about the foodstuffs import ban, is that submissive vatniks love to make posts, videos, etc. attacking their fellow citizens, laughing at them and saying: “You’ll just have to do without your jamon, Camembert, and Parmesan!” The implication is that the only people who buy these things are liberals and “creative class types” who have a better life than the salt-of-the-earth, working class Russian. Russia was actually importing something like 40% of its food when these idiotic “counter-sanctions” were announced, meaning that a lot of the banned imports were more or less ordinary goods, not expensive cheese, jamon, etc.

The other thing that makes this so infuriating, however, is that these submissive dipshits are attacking their own fellow citizens while the masters they support do not abide by their asceticism. Rest assured, Russia’s elite has plenty of access to the products they so gleefully order to be destroyed at the border. If they don’t have their channels to import it, they simply go there.

What better recent example than the honeymoon of Kremlin spokesperson Dmitry Peskov? After receiving a watch worth over half a million dollars, Peskov rented an incredibly expensive yacht to travel along the coast of “degenerate gayropa.” Not the Crimea, which needs tourism, not Sochi, which is practically abandoned, no- Europe.

And that’s what this all comes down to really. Whenever you hear a Russian politician or their cowardly, submissive supporters babbling on about “sovereignty,” understand that it doesn’t mean the same thing that it does for the rest of the world. Sovereignty in Russian parlance means that the elite should have a blank check to continually and constantly rob their own people, siphoning off money from vast natural resources, so that they can go ahead and turn it over to the West which they love so much.

Yes, the Russian elite loves the West.  They love it so much they’d steal from their nation, leaving millions impoverished and deprived of basic civil rights just to make sure that they and only they are allowed to taste the finest the West has to offer. If you are an ordinary Russian, you should shut up and be happy with austerity, import bans, censorship, and churches, lots of churches. But for the elite? Never!

You see, when they send their children to live abroad in those degenerate countries, and when they spend Russian taxpayer money on Western luxury, it’s to protect the masses from the dangers of consumerism. These brave  souls are essentially sacrificing for the sake of others! They are the patriots!

Volodymyr Viatrovych – Bullshit artist

Jared McBride exposes Viatrovych, a pseudo-historian and Holocaust denier behind Ukraine’s anti-free speech laws. And yes, I said Holocaust denier and meant it. This is the appropriate term for someone who dismisses and ignores scores of Jewish eyewitness testimonies and attributes all contrary evidence to a massive KGB conspiracy. If you want a good example, look at this excerpt, showing how Viatrovych ducks the question of collaborator atrocities in Poland and Belarus.

When confronted with the fact that the head of UPA, Roman Shukhevych, served the Nazis until 1943 as commander of a mobile police battalion that murdered thousands of civilians in Belarus, Viatrovych responded: “Is it possible to consider Poles or Belarusians a peaceful population, if, during the day, they work as ordinary villagers, only to arm themselves in the evening and attack the village?” In other words, civilians are fair targets, especially for “heroes” of Ukraine in the service of Nazis.

Viatrovych’s answer here is basically word-for-word the kind of thing you’ll hear from Holocaust deniers when it comes to Nazi atrocities on the Eastern Front. Believe me- I know. And yet for some reason nobody will explain, this kind of excuse making is tolerated right now when it concerns Ukrainian collaborators, but not for regular German forces or other pro-Axis organizations such as the Croatian Ustashe. If there’s a good reason for endorsing Holocaust denial in certain situations, I’d really love to hear it.

Viatrovych, try as he might, is essentially a vatnik mentally. In essence, there is no difference between him and a Russian “patriot” like Dugin or pseudo-historian Yuri Mukhin. If he were a real historian, he would not push so hard to get the state to enforce his historical narrative on the country, thus making it far easier for him to defend his revisionist claims. Just like in Putin’s Russia, Ukraine has people like Viatrovych whose claims cannot stand scrutiny and open debate, and thus they must be forced on people. This is why, again just like Russia, these people have a double approach to defending their claims. Outside their own borders, where they cannot control debate and use the state to suppress dissent, they resort to hysterical whataboutery and conspiracy theories. Inside their borders, they simply use the state to censor and crush dissent, effectively ending the debate before it begins. A vatnik and a vishivatnik are the same- only the packaging differs.

In short, fuck this guy. If he wants to be such a patriot, someone hand him a Kalashnikov and send his ass to the front. If he’s anything like his OUN/UPA predecessors, he’ll most likely desert to the separatists’ side.

What’s next

I’m fairly busy this week making various arrangements, but I’ll try to release some more original content before heading back to Ukraine for roughly two weeks. Stay tuned.

The News- 9 July 2015

I’ve been rather busy this week, so once again I’ve decided to aggregate the most interesting news stories I’ve seen this week and add my commentary.

But what about the Russian side of the story?

One of the biggest arguments against RT is their propensity for conveying expertise on people who lack it, as well as being extremely relaxed when it comes to who they let on the air. RT hands out titles like “political analyst” as though they were giving out candy on Halloween. This time they’ve given cred to a genuine Illuminati “expert,” who pontificates on the secret machinations of Freemasons and Zionists. This is hardlythe firsttime RT has put people with weird backgrounds on the air.

And this goes to the root of something that’s been bothering me lately. I keep hearing some people claim that the “mainstream Western media” totally shuts out “the Russian side.” Really? Which Russian side are you talking about? On almost every issue Russia has so many sides of the story you could play D&D with them. MH17 was simultaneously shot down by a Ukrainian Buk SAM and a Su-25 ground attack aircraft. Russia is a bastion of conservative traditional values and a progressive quasi-socialist resistance leader against neoliberal capitalism and neo-fascism. Please tell me how the “mainstream media” is supposed to deal with this.

And more to the point, how is the “mainstream media” supposed to react to the analysis of someone who believes in the Illuminati conspiracy? Are they supposed to treat this as a valid viewpoint? Is it really bias to dismiss this tin-foil hat wearer? Why should anyone take this network seriously with “experts” like that?

RT is run by adults, not children. If they want to be taken seriously, they can refuse to air the bullshit of people like Mr. Mason-hunter here. If they don’t want to be accused of being a propaganda bullhorn, they can introduce some actual objectivity to their coverage and invite guests who challenge the Kremlin’s narrative of events. There’s bias and then there’s propaganda. The Western media definitely has the former, but RT is the latter.

On a side note, rest assured that my Illuminati superiors are well aware of this “truthseeker” and have scheduled repeated chemtrail flights over his neighborhood.

Warmongering neocons in the US to cut army by 40,000 people.

This piece comes from a loyal reader in the Baltic region. Apparently the US army intends to cut its ranks by 40,000 personnel within two years. Keep in mind that this is after numerous base closures in Europe over the past few years. Prior to Putin’s little adventure in Ukraine, the US had about 30,000 military personnel in all of Europe, none of which were stationed in the new NATO members that border Russia. Many of those people were logistical personnel dealing with missions in Iraq and Afghanistan. Remember how recently US leaders were talking about returning heavy armor units to Europe? Yeah, “returning” because they haven’t been there for some time.

Remember folks, this is the neoconservative war machine that is supposedly escalating its threatening presence in Eastern Europe and encircling Russia for the final blow, and yet it’s still looking at a rapid reduction of its army even after Putin started throwing his weight around in the region. All Putin’s flailing and flopping around has apparently provoked one big “meh” from some folks at the Pentagon.

Not everyone’s happy, of course. Alaska Senator Dan Sullivan for example:

“One person who’s going to be very pleased with this is Vladimir Putin,” Sullivan said.

Oh don’t worry, Dan. While the troop numbers are reduced, Putin’s media machine will be finding all kinds of “evidence” of a massive military buildup in Alaska, poised at seizing Siberia. Putin and many Russians know that America wants to do this because one time some KGB mindreaders gleaned this plan from the brain of Madeline Albright.

Anyway, just another example of how the US actually reduces its presence and military size and gets labeled a warmongerer while Russia significantly increases its military budget, its military size, and actually starts a war, and yet it’s all fine and dandy because Russia’s “threatened” by “NATO encirclement.”

Why the Russia-China Axis is Bullshit Article No. 3,427

Again and again, when you point out Russia’s economic weakness and growing stagnation, the geopolitical expert’s go-to answer is “But CHINA!” No, silly vatnik, China is not going to save Russia. China has its own interests, many of which are contradictory to the wacky fantasies of Russia’s leadership, and it is not running a charity. If this Russia-China relationship continues, it’s the latter who will be wearing the pants in that family.

Virtually every time Putin visits a country, or its foreign minister or head of state comes to Moscow, the Russian press beams with the same claims:

1. Country X is turning away from the West and embracing the Russian “alternative.”

2. Country X has expressed interest in trading in local currencies.

3. This represents a new strategic alliance between Russia and Country X!

Almost every time you can look at the details and see how idiotic this is. Take Turkey, an example of one of Russia’s latest BFF’s since last December, when Putin visited the country and announced the construction of a new gas pipeline whose construction may in fact be physically possible. Turkey is a NATO member. It does not recognize the annexation of the Crimea, nor does it recognize the the DNR or LNR in Ukraine. More importantly, in Syria Turkey is anti-Assad while Russia is enthusiastically pro-Assad. This isn’t just rhetoric; Turkey has been providing material support to the rebels, including those associated with the Islamic State. On that note, I know from personal experience that Turkey’s government has a soft-spot for Islamic fighters in the North Caucasus. Turkey is also against the Al-Sisi regime in Egypt, which Russia supports in spite of this little incident.

Getting back to China, Russia’s biggest BFF doesn’t recognize the Crimea as part of Russia, and has extended friendly overtures toward Ukraine’s new government almost from the very beginning. And contrary to Russian fantasies, China isn’t chomping at the bit to fuck over the USA, since it has a crucial, mutually beneficial economic relationship with that country. In fact, the relationship China has with the US, however strained it might appear at times, is no doubt far more important to Chinese leaders than the relationship with Russia.

As one friend pointed out, the idiocy of Putin’s little adventure is that he’s burning bridges with countries that have no territorial claims on Russia and running straight into the embrace of a country that has such claims. China has every incentive to watch quietly while Russia increasingly alienates all the nations which could potentially help it in the event that it has any sort of conflict with China. Eventually, China will be able to dictate terms to Moscow more and more brazenly, and should the latter balk, they will have nobody to turn to.

News Roundup

So our first story of the week is about an American prisoner in North Korea.  He’s been sentenced to six years for what seems like a bullshit charge of espionage, but I couldn’t help but notice that he says he’s in good health and works eight hours a day. Apparently he’s managed to achieve a standard of living many Americans would kill for these days.

Next we have a story about Turkish youth being attracted to ISIS.  Take a look at this quote, which could have come from any right-winger from Russia to Kansas:

“The children of that country see all this and become either murderers or delinquents or homosexuals or thieves,” she wrote.

Well obviously the solution to that is to murder people who don’t follow your wacky beliefs, preferably by beheading them! Thank Tayyip Erdogan and his AK Party for this bullshit.

And lastly, we have something Russia related. The Duma is discussing a bill which will make it possible to seize foreign owned assets in Russia. Congratulations, dipshits! You just discovered yet another way to speed up the already torrential flow of capital out of Russia, which will not be replaced by domestic capital because those who hold the purse strings are either too busy hoarding it, or trying to find new places to hide it. Of course the average dumbass on the street will still loudly proclaim that Russia doesn’t need foreign capital, quietly ducking into Sberbank to exchange another wad of rubles for US dollars just minutes later.  It must be liberating indeed when you don’t require any sort of consistency between your public proclamations and your actions.