Let’s make some movies!

So Meduza released this article about the Russian Ministry of Culture’s draft document indicating what sort of films they intend to fund in 2015. According to the article, the document says priority for funding will go to films about the following themes:

-Success stories that inspire people (in areas such as manufacturing, entrepreneurialism(sic), and civic activism);

This generally gets you arrested or exiled unless you are a close personal friend of Putin, and then sometimes that doesn’t even save you.

“The roles of Crimea and Ukraine in the 1,000-year history of the Russian state;”

Let’s see…The Crimea basically became part of the Russian empire in 1795 or thereabouts. The empire, the beginning of the state of “Rossiya,” is usually dated to about 1721, and it ended in 1917, meaning it lasted less than 200 years, much less than the United States. The modern Russian state has been around for a whopping 24 years.

“Russian military glory (its victories and victors);”

No Russo-Japanese War, WWI, or Crimean War. Got it.

“Film adaptations of Russian literary classics;”

Because we don’t have enough of those, and we’ve never managed to produce any decent literature in almost a quarter of a century.

“Modern-day heroes in the fight against crime and corruption;”

These people end up dead, or in jail. Or dead in jail. Which Russia do these ministry of culture flacks live in? Oh right, the one behind four-meter-high green metal walls with 24/7 security.

“A society without borders” (success stories from from individuals with disabilities);”

Dude in a wheelchair wins the US green card lottery and books it.

“Historical anniversaries (such as the 100th anniversary of the October Revolution, and the 25th anniversary of the August 1991 Putsch);”

Sorry, but October revolution contradicts the glory of the Great Russian Empire and will offend believers.

“Family values as the foundation of Russian society; and
Russia as a multiethnic country.




Shut the fuck up.

1 thought on “Let’s make some movies!

  1. michael baker from nova scotia canada

    awesome! you got it, kovpak – so true. ha-ha-ha. L-o-L-z, yeah. slavic-nazis: hitler and company would not BELIEVE it was possible (TODAY) … but then they would use them and WASTE them, just like they used the ever-loyal (LoL) “banderian” western ukranians (even after the germans decided to basically starve the “banderian’s” fellow ukranian countrymen, since, after-all, they were only sub-human, with their round (though often enough blond and blue eyed) pancake-faced meat heads, these slavic-peoples “contaminated” by some distant mongol or tatar, asiatic blood). oh god yeah. i have NeVeR, ever, EVER understood the NUMEROUS slavic nazis today… HAHA. HA-HA-HA. sad, (and pig-fucking STUPID!!).


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