Your Russian Zen Koans for the Day

Surround yourself in total silence. Sit in a relaxed and comfortable posture. Now contemplate the following until you achieve enlightenment:

Sanctions will only make Russia stronger, but Russian sanctions on Ukraine will destroy that country.

Sanctions will make Russia stronger, but the West is bad for levying sanctions on Russia and other countries.

Sanctions will make Russia stronger, yet all countries which have sanctions against them are either underdeveloped or not economically significant.

Sanctions will make Russia stronger, but the government still warned the West against levying them.

Sanctions will make Russia stronger, but Russia’s counter-sanctions are damaging the European and American economy!

Sanctions will make Russia stronger, even though this hasn’t actually happened at any time in history.

Sanctions will make Russia stronger, but liberal opposition leaders who had been calling for Western sanctions against Russia for years are filthy traitors!

Sanctions will make Russia stronger, but beer coaster coffee cups.

Sanctions will make Russia stronger, but scissors don’t chainsaw cotton candy trees off the side of a refrigerator.

Sanctions will make Russia stronger…

Sanctions will make Russia stronger…

Sanctions…

Stronger…

They will hurt the West more than Russia!

They are counter-productive!

They will make Russia stronger, but don’t you DARE levy sanctions against us!

Sanctions glappa nogawa seliu blarta fleerep!

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